Week two, the sun came out much more. We live life on Belize time; very relaxed, no hurrying. Food at restaurants generally takes a while (maybe because we eat in groups of 12), busses are early/late you never really know, everyone is relaxed about time. One afternoon Scott and I were done by 1 so we biked to the sea and took naps on the dock under the sun. To was a mostly busy week of patients and presentations in the afternoon. I am clinging to bible verses written out for me by Jess and Sanjay. I have my bible too, but it’s easier in the morning to grab a pocket verse from S or read it in my journal from Jess. It’s like my dear friends provided me with scripture to turn to, so grateful for that. This week I saw two wrist fractures, spina bifida, developmental delay, and back pain.
I made some mistakes and had to look things up while also improving in my evaluation skills, so I can tell I am learning a lot. It is nice to have autonomy and do whatever I think and then receive feedback instead of having to do what my CI wants. There is so much learning and growing when you have the space and freedom! The same with faith and prayer. Sometimes we may get into a routine or get used to something, but may encounter God in a new way when we create space or are forced to a place of space and stillness. God shows up in all areas!
This weekend we were supposed to go to Lyme Caye, a private island in the Caribbean Sea, and stay in beach-cabins and go snorkeling. But the forecast calls for rain so we aren’t going. The sun came out Thursday on our day off and we got to swim in or neighbor’s pool and it was just the most wonderful thing. We found a breakfast place in town called Snack Shack and I got eggs with bell peppers and iced (called a slushie) coffee. It was such a wonderful morning. Then we went zip lining and swam in a hot spring. When we walk places, we are a blur of backpacks and fanny packs and sunglasses and it makes me laugh.
Belize. I love it. I love the routine of early morning runs, waking up to roosters and going to sleep to crickets (and frogs and dogs). I love the morning sunrise among clouds on the hilly road. I love our living room at night when we talk or read or watch movies. I love the blur of scrubs (all colors) running around the kitchen every weekday morning, making coffee and oatmeal and toast. I love the physical therapy clinic. It’s a tiny little sidewalk that follows the slant of the hill down to our clinic. Which is a room with doors and windows that hinge open, no screens. The view from the back of the clinic is jungle. Out of every window all you see is green. And I really love my bed, how it’s by the window and I always wake up and look first-thing out the window. I love mornings because they are so still and quiet, sometimes still dark. I listen for the sound of rain and tiptoe out the room to an empty house, (unless Rachel is awake) as I sleepily put on my running shoes (which I check for spiders first) then grab my name badge and head outside. We have our name badges that we wear with patients, but we have to give them to the security guard before we leave so he knows when we are gone. So on my morning run he holds my name tag until I return. And when we go away for the weekend we give him a handful of 12 name tags. It’s funny.
My month in Belize is currently halfway over. Still in touch with people for home, it’s weird to think of people are doing there everyday thing at home too, while I’m living in the jungle. I’ve gotten updates from my hometeam that are both good, mundane, and bad. Emily told me of her aunt’s miscarriage and her grandpa-in-law broke his back. My small group had some changes coming up. Sanjay is super busy in New York. My mom got sick. I pray prayers back to the US and feel prayers coming from the US. It feels right to be here and be away from my busy Chicago life; and there are times where of course I want to snap myself home and sit in my apartment and eat pumpkin cake with Jessa and Mon or be at Starbucks with Erica and Jordan, or be holding Sanjay’s hand walking the streets of Chicago, or be home in Traverse City watching Friends with my mom. I think it’s good to have things and people and places to miss. I also usually always miss being home with my mom, or I may miss living in Caboose, or any weekend where I’m around my Emmer. So thankful to have a heart that is filled by these things. And it also happens where sometimes you know you’re exactly where you’re meant to be, when you’re doing something you were created for. This feeling may not be everyday but I know when I have this feeling. It feels holy and thin and right. I have those moments here too. So yes, up and down, yes and no, USA and C.A. All of the above and the in-between.