i fell into Lent

I’ve needed a push, a reason, some structure. And I think Lent came at the perfect time. Because I can’t go one more day in this floosy, blah, busy lifestyle. So I fell into this time with an exhausted physical self, a hopeful and expectant spiritual self, and a worn emotional self. Here I am.

Things I’ve realized: the world is a buzzkill to the cross. A lyric in church that stuck out to me on Sunday was “the cross before me, the world behind me”. Because when we truly have our eyes on the cross, the world is nothing, or at least feels way less of anything compared to the cross. Church tends to feel like this, as does bible study, or anytime I listen to worship music or have God-moments or a conversation where Jesus and Holy Spirit are ever-present. These moments are gold, filling, sustaining… until the to-do list looms, or the bus is delayed, or you mindlessly forgot to bring something to school. The world is stress and fear and push while the cross is peace and joy and mercy.

So I find myself here: world behind me (please stay there), cross before me, 40 days before me. I find myself on a journey with my whole-heart to prepare for Easter, for Jesus’ resurrection, for Jesus’ love and grace and courage displayed.

Dear Lord,
I pray over these 40 days. To meet you in these days, to consistently choose you and the cross over the world. To find you among the world. To believe I. your love. To love others as you love. To know you and make you known. Thank you for reminding me to be still and prepare my heart, you know I need it.
In Jesus’ name,


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